Seizing Opportunities and Defining Success with Stu Dodd

Hello everyone and welcome to the Curious Ulsterman podcast. The podcast is designed to equip you with the tools and wisdom you need to for a person adult. I'm your host, johnny aka the Curious Ulsterman, and today I'm joined by my good friend, stu Dodd. Stu has been a friend of mine for the better part of a decade and he has been very influential in helping me become the man I am today. He has an absolutely incredible life story, from his time in the army to where I met him in the maritime industry, and today we sit down to discuss the most important life lessons that he's learned along the way. So, without further delay, here is my conversation with my good friend, stu Dodd. Stu, welcome to the show, brother. This has been months in the making and I'm finally glad to have you here.

Yeah, you're starting to catch up with me, mate. I'm sorry it's been so long.

No, not at all. I love the fact that, even with modern technology, we can chat often through WhatsApp and share memes and stuff. And then, yeah, every so often, we get this nice little thing of we can chat somewhat virtually or, when I'm in England, see you face to face for a pint. But, man, I'm looking forward to this conversation for ages.

Yeah, yeah, it's been too long and this is the first experience I've ever had with a podcast. So be gentle, darling, be very gentle.

No, absolutely man. Well it's interesting you say that in the this is your first ever podcast, because I think you're such an incredible character and I've known you for quite some time now and in the same way that, like you're a very capable man and I'm going to help guide you through this podcast, I can't help but feel you've guided me through my twenties, because we know each other from the maritime industry and I met you, I want to say, 11 years ago now, and then, ever since we've been on, you know similar circles. You've always been that somewhat guiding hand for me. I feel so, in a way, I'm repaying the favor, but at the same time I think that I owe a lot of my personal growth. You know to you and Smudge as well, who I haven't spoken to in years. Unfortunately, I keep me the other way. See if he'll come on the show, but I don't know if he would. I don't know if this is this kind of thing. Yeah it's all coming full circle, isn't it?

That leads me to a story that I was thinking about this morning. Funny enough. Do you remember when we first met?

We do. Actually. I remember they said this story a few times to a few people and I said you know Stu Dawes, like I met random people within our circle and he goes, yeah, I know Stu and I go. You know, the first time we met he stabbed me and I'm like what, what it's like I don't know, he's giving me my vaccination, yeah, but do you remember Swampy?

I do remember.

Swampy at the time.

Yes, I do. So this is my side of meeting you. I was working with Chris Marsh and, as you know, chris is an interesting individual Very nice lad, but interesting, should we call it and he'd given you a watch because you weren't turning up in time.

Yes, I remember that.

And so he introduced me to you and showed me this watch and so we got talking about the watch and what you were doing and stuff like that and then we kind of parted company for a few months and then I saw you again and said oh, how's the watch doing? And you looked at me and went who the hell are you? I felt terrible. Well, it gets better. Then we met another time and I started talking to you again and you gave me the same thing, but it was the third meeting where we actually got the talk.

It was only when you said, oh yeah, remember that time I stabbed you in sickbay, I went, oh yeah, I was like, oh, I felt absolutely scondered. I was like because I remember we had a great conversation in sickbay and I left thinking what a great guy. And then I just say I met you for 10 minutes, didn't see you again, I think for six, seven months, and I'm terrible for this. There was a guy I worked with, the same place we were, and I spent, I think, a good two or three weeks with him on a job and then I didn't see him for about a year and a half. And he's chatting away with me like he's known me forever and I'm sat there like who are you? I don't even know you. I go right and normally it's the face of the name. I'll recognize one or the other, but in this case I didn't recognize both and he was absolutely lovely man. He just looked at, he stopped the sort of conversation and he just looked at you don't remember who I am. I'm so sorry to know. But then he explained and we had a good laugh Once. He mentioned a couple of things. I was like, oh no, I remember, yes, and then made him a cup of tea. Just sorry, paul.

No, no worries from my and Johnny. Each meeting was good as a first.

Oh, 100%. You've got such an interesting life story, which is why I've brought you on. Do you want to share with the audience you know just a little bit of your own personal story and we can certainly discuss our own experiences in the maritime industry, because there's no shortage of that but just to give an audience a bit of a flavor of who you are, Do you want us to give a bit of a background on yourself?

Yeah, before I start, mate, I just wanted to say how good I think your podcasts are. Oh, thank you man, I've listened to them and so many times you know, in the car and just been saying, yes, that is spot on. You know, and I would compare you to some of the ones that you've actually talked about the Ryan, the guy in the stoicism.

Oh right, holiday yeah.

I think yours are better. I think he's very good. Well, thank you very much. Yours is rower and closer to the bone, so I think you're probably more realistic. And there's not an advert every 30 seconds as well, which?

yeah, I'm trying to keep the podcast advert free, but you know, shameless plug. If you want to make a donation to help the podcast, I really appreciate that, mate. Thank you so much.

Well, thank you as well for mentioning me and one of your podcasts. I think understand why. It's why I featured, and thank you very much for the compliment. I appreciate it.

Oh yeah, that was my round table of mentors and coaches. You're at my imaginary round table of my advisors.

Yeah, it's that. That was the first podcast I've ever listened to. I didn't even know what a podcast was until you said I've mentioned you, but thank you very much, mate. That's one of the nicest compliments I've ever had.

Oh well, you've been very good to me, stu. So far I've returned the favor.

Just doing what I do, mate, Just doing what I do. Okay, so me as a guy? So I literally live opposite my childhood school, oh well, so that's kind of nostalgic in a fact, and you see how small the children are and you can't believe you were that small.

Yeah.

Kind of as you see them, just don't believe that's a possible thing. I want to say that a wonderful upbringing with two very loving parents worked very hard, both of them to give us everything we wanted, so kind of, I would say, very privileged in a way of no real hardship or anything like that. I didn't like being a child, that's, I think, just. You know, I always wanted to be grown up or bigger or tougher or yeah, I know the feeling.

I know the feeling.

You know where. You just want to be taken seriously because kind of, yeah, maybe you want your own space or something like that. But I don't think you grasp how protected you are those kind of years. So, growing up, as you know, when you go through your awkward teens I think maybe the in-betweeners is probably the most accurate description of most young man's teens yeah, saying stupid things, doing stupid things, you know. You know, chatting a girl up by commenting on her socks or something like that and yeah, just doesn't work in you. I can complete idiot, don't you? So, yeah, kind of awkwardness going through there. Couple of part-time jobs I was a projectionist one time, working in cinemas. Oh really, yeah, it was kind of interesting. I was terrible at scratching the films quite a lot, you know. But you know, when you're a young man and it's just incoming money, then you don't really give a monkeys about it. You know, first-time job Early part of my life I was in the forces, went across to Bosnia, did that war in about 95, 96. That's not a great place to be. It's a. I equate that as a life experience that you wouldn't wish on anyone else, in a sense that you see and hear and you know, experience of horrible things that maybe shape you as a character. But you know, maybe for the better, maybe for the worse. I was very gung-ho before I went as a kind of as a young man, but that place, if anything, taught me to understand what's important, what's maybe not so. Stuff that you originally thought was really important, you could really trivialize and say that don't matter. You know, I have a watchword in my world at the moment If there's something really pressing, the first question is is anyone going to die because of it? And if that answers no, then okay, we've got time. Then you know.

I like that philosophy.

Yeah, it's if you can step back. I think you can make a better assertion If you go in above the top and you don't need to have that kind of reaction or your reaction is heavy duty and then you can wind back. But you can't ever go, you know, if you've gone into too softly and it's gone wrong, kind of stuff.

Just very quickly on that because I don't want to dwell on it. But for anyone who's considering joining the military, do you have one bit of advice for them? Do you have any just words of wisdom before we just move on to the next part?

of your story. Military careers are vast and really know what you want to do. Because if you want to go short term and have fun, there's regiments or places or you know Army, air Force, navy there's jobs that you could do for three, four years, have it on your CV, have fun, see some interesting places. But if you really want to make a career out of it, really do your homework and know what you're joining. You know, I think, because your outcome, once you're in it, it's hard to change and career offers will tell you something totally different. But by the same token, you know, get fit, enjoy it, you know, take what you can from it as many experiences you can, I would argue my time in the forces and stuff like that has probably given me, you know, this wisdom you're talking about. It's given me a lot of opportunities and, in between the forces and stuff like that, other jobs. You know, all these things that I've managed to do are through age and probably through just being exposed to these different things, so kind of, if it's offered, suck it up, take it, enjoy it, you know, and then pass it on to somebody else. You know, one of the things I always like to do is share experiences with people so they can go bloody hell. That was great. Thanks for showing me that. And they'll take it on themselves. And I taught a mate recently to compound bow shoot, so I love archery and this guy was kind of hesitant and he shot his first arrow and it was almost perfect. I didn't do a great do your tutorage. He was the natural in itself, but when he kind of got let's call it a bullseye, the smile on his face was enough payment that I would teach that over and over again and that's quite rewarding, I think.

Yeah, you know, there's a famous quote which I'm not even going to attempt to repeat because it's very intellectual, but it essentially comes up with the term that essentially, life is service. It's the act of serving others that makes life most rewarding. I'll probably put up my Instagram stories to do subscribe to the Instagram folks, and that's something I think that's definitely defined our relationship. Like you've always been serving and it's well. That's by teaching younger people, like you're not an old man but you know, in the case of, it's a case of you know, you've taught me quite a few things and also just in your general work and things like that, you constantly are of service to people and I suppose with a military thing, you would, I suppose, if you'd want to make yourself as employable afterwards, so maybe perhaps go into a career that is easily transferable and can get you a job when you do eventually leave the military. Would that be correct?

Yeah, I think so. I think that the skills that you can attain from there, whether it be leadership, fitness or some kind of trade, something like that, just makes perfect sense, isn't it why, if you can not, I think young men are too young for school. When they're doing the exams and stuff like that, I don't think they can apply themselves as much as the girls do. So I had a friend was my mother's friend a lady who said men should leave school at 13, 14 and grow up and then come back at 18. And then they really get what they need to do. I think that's really true in a sense that you know 13 year olds up to I don't know, 17, 18, probably need to sit on the Xbox and get the highest score and then go OK, I'm ready now. You know, that's not for all, obviously, but by the same token I wasn't interested in the exams and things like that.

No, that's always the way. Yeah, hopefully I've had this conversation before Nathan and others that hopefully education will evolve to meet people's needs. Rather than you know it's 200 years old or form of education that needs to adapt. But that's an entirely other episode and probably for a teacher. So he did some time in the military and then what came after that?

Joining the maritime industry. I worked for bridge telecom as well, so up holes and down holes, that was quite interesting job. If anything, it taught me a bit of DIY, using kind of mechanical tools and stuff like that and a little bit of wiring stuff like that. So that was you know. I think that adds to your confidence and skill base so you can kind of go on your own project or I don't know why are a stereo into your own car and not be afraid to do that stuff.

Yeah, and I think that brings us up really to, I want to say, the modern day. But eleven years ago we, when we first met, yeah it was, it was interesting. I think we've we've shared quite an interesting Experient. Well, several interest, interesting experiences in the maritime industry. I don't think any. I was about to say no, life at sea is boring, but I think it is a mixture of sometimes quite high adrenaline and sometimes you know my numbing boringness. But I would say, what do you think was probably, what do you think is probably the most interesting experience you've had in the maritime industry?

I think I'm the different trips where we've been abroad I've been quite a mind broadening and they some of the places that we've seen. You would argue you couldn't just go there or you know, certainly in the way that we did remember in america, when I mean, some other chaps went up and quiet down that river for three days yes, I still wish I could have gone on that, but just wasn't available time.

I think I was doing a job and I wasn't available.

So you know, as you know, young men would often just go for drinking, kind of spend all the wages just in the local bars and stuff that. But this trip was amazing in the sense we hired these. Can you in a place called darien and Can you on this river called the ultimatum, and you know the foreign, for you could see out there and you know alligators on the side of the banks and stuff like that.

you know just fantastic experience For that out there yeah, is this a sand trip where you thought you were gonna get attacked by hillbilly's?

they were like yeah you gotta have to tell the audience this story, yeah so we're in a hunting camp On the side of a bank and about two, three o'clock in the morning we had the soft thumb of a speedboat and all of us had watched the film deliverance. If you haven't watched it, do. It's a battle of the banjo's territory. So so three of us for that stacy mentioned earlier reached down into out of his sleeping bag and pulled out a little acts you've been using for us to chop some wood. On my right side I had a KS K bar US Marines fighting knife, which I thought well, someone's gonna get that if they even have a go. And the third guy, called gary, got deep in his sleeping bag and hope that no one would find.

If they can't see me, if I can't see it, the friend doesn't exist.

No, where was on this island?

Yeah, I don't know if you yeah, I don't know if you listen to my episode with John bull, the one of my meeting last meeting Sasquatch, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I, just I, I throw. I had a weapon. I definitely would have drawn it just in case, but I didn't have anything. So I went I'm dead, I'm just gonna die comfortably in the same bike.

So yeah, it did remind me of that. I I think it wasn't a Sasquatch, I think it was a natural haggis. Yeah, it's a sabre tooth haggis.

What do you have for young people leaving school or potentially leaving university? And you know I, like it see, actually looks at somewhat appealing, something a bit adventurous, what, what sort of advice would you have for people considering that kind of career?

I think Just it's going back to joining the forces. It's kind of grabbing every opportunity you can in life to kind of see and do different things. The I loved your quote the other day about you have to be foolish before you become wise In the sense of this. You know you did tell me and I kind of think, yeah, get these things out the way. So I love these ideas of gap years or all these kind of things. Obviously not everyone can afford that, but there are things you can do that I just kind of open your eyes to different things. And you know, sit in an Xbox or watching telly or drinking beer isn't really gonna Broaden in that sense. So I think you know, grab every opportunity, can work hard To get where you wanna be. I've got friends that my age and you know that they've achieved nothing In the lives and they don't own anything, not that that's a marker of success. But now they're looking back and say, look, I'm nearly fifty, nothing to my name. And you know I think I was a late start during success. I've done loads of silly things and but never I wasn't initially successful in any sense. So I say to a lot of young lads I work with don't be me. You know they can push for a higher position within the company's or wherever they work. You know, don't become bound to a mortgage. Where you are mortgages time isn't it? You're setting off and what is this from your podcast? But the you know if you've got a mortgage, you are giving a certain amount of time to pay that back.

So yes, that was your guys that was our interview with Dylan on building wealth and getting your first budget. Yes, see the podcast work.

Yeah, yeah, such a point, in fact, isn't it? So why not do that in relative comfort, you know? Just just be measured in everything you do.

Yeah, well, just based off that statement you said, statement you said I have the sort of two questions I'd like to sort of throw into the conversation. Given your life experience, perhaps this is a very broad question. So answer is specific or as broadly as you'd like. But you know how would you Define success of a young man or woman? Came to you and says you know what's your definition of success? Now, obviously you can apply it to individuals and go success to one person zoning a Ferrari and success to another one is having, you know, just, a happy and stable family. But you know what, do you have a philosophy on success? Or you know what do you think?

I think success is purely gonna be as what you define it, because you know, I have one got friend who he he doesn't know a lot, but his family life is lovely and they do wonderful things together on a very small budget, but it's exactly what they want. I measure my own success success by things I've managed to do. You know, I'm kind of well traveled and get to do all these wonderful things like road bikes, scuba dive and all these kind of things I've been very lucky and fortunate to be able to do. So could, if my life were to end tomorrow and I had 30 minutes to look back and go right, how many box or a ticked here? I think that would be my level of success. Was there anything missing that I should have done? And I think up until this point, there's not many things left for me to do, apart from, you know, provide my wife and doggies the best lives they can have. And, kind of, you mentioned life is serving just a while back there, jordan Peterson kind of quote there, isn't it? I think life is service. It's a lovely way to look at it, because if you're not helping someone else out in a way, what are you doing? So yeah, I kind of think if I had my half hour left to go now, I've pretty much ticked every box. So it's whatever. You think that. Have you ticked every box in your life to get to where you are? You know, and if not, only you can change that.

Yeah, I really like that and I'm also happy for you that you know you've in your mind you've ticked most of the or all boxes. You know I've still got some way to go, but you know it definitely gives me the kick up the butt to, at least you know, get after it and to you know, as you would say, not sit and play Xbox and rest in your laurels.

Like Marcus Aurelius? Isn't it going to your stoicism?

Oh, yes, yeah, I'll be totally transparent. The past sort of three or four days have been a real struggle with the stoicism. But I suppose you know it's never going to be, it's never going to be an easy ride. I suppose that's the best time to practice stoicism when you really don't feel like it.

So that's probably quite stoic in itself, isn't it?

Yeah, yeah, I suppose it is. You go back and talk for him.

You've reflected on it and therefore you're going to act on it. But that surely is stoicism in its humblest form.

Yeah, yeah, a question I do want to ask because you know, based on the statistics of the podcast, you know 70% of the audience are male in Europe and, not to discount, obviously, our lady audience, you know value every single one of these. But for young men who are still you're still trying to establish themselves in this world and they're still trying to figure out who they are, is it as a kind of like a beacon, if you know what I mean, what would be your definition of what is a good man?

Good man, yeah, for me, honest, reliable, dependable. I want to say fit, because I think healthy body, healthy mind, you know, I think if you're physically fit, you're mentally fit and you're prepared to take on things that some guys wouldn't or girls wouldn't, you know, girls are allowed fun too. Yeah, I kind of. I think if you think it's a good quality, you can't be wrong in a way, you know, and any single quality that you could deem worthwhile or you know, honesty goes a massive way, doesn't it? If you're continually honest and trustworthy and you wear your heart and your sleeve and you tell people I don't know that you love them or that you appreciate them and stuff like that, it goes a long way and people take you seriously. Being a credible guy, I think, is good, you know, just being credible, being a credible bloke, credible person, goes a long way.

That's something. All of that was great. But I think the blokes especially and I'll be totally transparent, you know I've desired this as well. But what do you define credibility? Because we all, because blokes especially, want to be seen as credible in the eyes of their peers. That you know, quote unquote they could stand, and you know, back in the day, in the shield wall and they'd be counted on in the modern times. Can you be counted upon to provide for your family, do your bit for society? So, in your mind, what do you mean by credibility Like, can you expand upon it?

I think it depends. You've probably got credibility within your family, haven't you? As in Johnny's doing well and Johnny's got his podcast going and all these kind of wonderful things. You know, I don't think you have to explain to your family about credible, because most families will love you, no matter what, to your friends if you're the honest guy who is selfless and is generous, you know, not with money or things, but with your time and just kind of listening to what people have to say and just, I don't know, help them out when you can. You know, have a good analogy about some of my old army mates that you could ring them from from any time of the day and say let's two o'clock in the morning and a good old friend, big old guy called Steve Williams, whose forearms were like my thighs, a ridiculously strong guy. And if I rang him up at two o'clock in the morning and said, mate, I'm in prison but if you bail me out, they let me out today. But you're going to have to come and collect me and it's a right mate. Where are you and how much money do I need? Ten thousand quid and I'm in America. Here you go. All right, get the keys. Get the keys and I'm on my way. Obviously that's an overstatement, but you should be there for your friends. A psychologist I really like a guy called Carl Rogers and he talked about a client centered approach when he used to deal with his patients and he used to talk about being there for people and it's something you do very well. It's being in the present. So when you're talking to someone, you are there and you're listening, and it's clear that you're there to listen to what they have to say and your responses are quite measured. And he was also a fan of being congruent, so that's kind of meaning being super genuine with people, which is something that you have. And then his third thing was unconditional positive regard, and that is literally what you're doing now, because you are listening to everything I'm saying and coming back to me with it. So if you can do that for your friends in their time of need, or even if they just need to blow off some steam, arguably that makes you a credible bloke.

I like that yeah.

Cheers.

Princess.

Love you too.

Yeah, that's fantastic because I think as well that, like to me, I regard you as, like that, classic gentleman, in that you have your amount of many skills and, speaking frankly, you have the capacity to do great violence on someone. You are, you're strong and capable, you know, and I know, like there was that one time remember there was the judo we did in. Scotland and for a laugh, you had three of us attack you at once and within about 30 seconds, three of us were in a pile of bodies on top of each other.

I did feel like that young Royal Marine who thought he was a tough chap. Do you remember?

him. Yes, I do. I think the eagle got hit a bit there.

Yeah, Paulette, some old guy with a beard. Yeah, I have been referred to as the gentleman thug before the gentleman thug.

But that's interesting because I know that you know I would class you as you know, you have the capacity for violence, but you choose not to, and that's, and instead you choose to serve people and you choose to be gentle with people and genuine with people. And you know, it's kind of like that analogy of that old quote about war, isn't it? It's better to be, you know, a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war. You know, and I think that if I was to give a quote, that would, like, you know, be your quote. But what you just said was really good, because being credible, I think that, not so much now, but I think there was a time when blokes were expected to just be hard on each other, just to be, you know, bravado and gung-ho, whereas there's a time and a place. I think that's the key, isn't it? There's a time and a place for everything. There's a time and a place to be nothing but strong, to the point, blunt, but then I think there's a time for being kind and gentle. It was interesting. I don't know if you ever heard the study about. There's this whole cultural phenomenon which is completely wrong about the whole, like alpha male, wolf and all that kind of thing. I think everybody's heard of it. But what a lot of people don't know is that the dude who originally did that study has spent the rest of his career trying to debunk it, because he did the whole, he studied. He did genuinely study a wolf pack that was in captivity and wolves in captivity act completely different to wolves in the wild. So the quote unquote alpha male, so to speak, in the wild is the loving father of the pack, like he walks at the back of the pack to make sure no one's left behind and is strong, capable of extreme violence for finding off another wolf pack, but is the kind and loving father within the greater it's the wrong word to use, but pride, if you will, because it's pride of lions, but we'll say wolf pack, so to speak, as well. And I think that there is a very dangerous thing in culture, I think, to have this low wolf alpha male. I don't give a crap what anybody thinks about me and being this hard ass, but for someone like yourself to say that and I know you're a good man and you're capable of holding your own but the fact that you can say to younger people, especially young men, and say, look, you don't have to have the gung-ho, I'm a hard ass. I can't show any weakness or emotion for you to be able to say that. I think at least give some people not the permission but the well, if this dude, who's got a ton of life experience under his belt, is credible and we can respect and listen to him, can say that it kind of opens the door, I feel. What are your thoughts on that?

I think you're allowed to be however you want to be. I come from a generation of guys that don't talk about things and I think that's okay. But I think you should also be okay with if you want to talk about it and it has some kind of therapeutic effect. Please do, and I think we're getting better at it. My initial military career was literally shut up. Get on with it. Have I suffered from it? I think I do sometimes, but for me, I think I work through that better on my own because I get it. I get what I'm feeling. I think I'm guilty of maybe other people being aware of it and sometimes I might kind of go into a dark place that is very hard for me to go out on, but I don't think I have the necessary skills to vocalise it in a way. But by the same token, yeah, I'm really keen into people talking and being able to take that first step to your own self recovery. You mentioned going to therapy and I think it's probably very much like what you experience. You're probably nervous of it originally and that kind of stigmatism of if you have therapy, you're mad, or that kind of old fashioned you know stiff up a lip stuff is should be well in the past and I've worked with people therapeutically quite a lot in my life through some of the jobs I've done and I've seen the benefits, absolutely seen the benefits, you know, and whether we baby steps with these people take a long time to come to terms with whatever's kind of ailing them, or some people I've noticed turn around in a very short space of time because, as we kind of touched on back there, if someone's prepared to sit down and listen and really listen, that they can just pick themselves up from there.

Yeah, no, 100%. I think listening. Listening is a key, it's a very, it's a skill that's not properly taught. Something that really challenged me was, you know, do you listen to reply or do you listen to understand? And that really challenged me because I was like, okay, we naturally, I think, listen to reply, because obviously you want to reply in a logical and coherent way. But you know, doing the latter listening to understand requires you to suspend your ego and just be present with the person and have empathy and things. And I think that you know the more we can do that as blokes and you know girls as well I think girls do a much better job of it than blokes but I think the more we can do that we're on the right path and the we're coming up on near the end of the show, but a couple of final questions I do have for you. Is you know, given the sum total of your life experience, do you, what sort of advice would you have for young people leaving school and university? They're neither quote unquote adult. They can do whatever they want when they want, and their, their whole life is ahead of them. What, what advice would you have before they set out on that journey?

I think it's going back to this kind of life experience thing. See as many things as you can see, do as many things as you can do, you know. Just don't have closed eyes. Open your world up to everything you can. You know your life is going to be ups and downs, you know. But through some of these experiences, where they're painful or good, that's how you grow. So just have a go at everything. You may hate some of the things you try out. Let's say you try scuba diving lesson and that first experience underwater is just vile for you. At least you know what it's like, you know. Jump out of the plane, see what's thinking about that takes you, you know. Obviously with a parachute, that's yeah. But yeah, don't be closed or anything. Don't be closed to any ideas. Never, ever be married to an idea that someone might come along and come up with a basic fact that just blows you out the water. That's something you held, do you for a long time. You know. Always be prepared to listen to people because they might have a much better idea on a subject than you. Look after each other. Don't sell service. Just try and try and enjoy whatever you can and ride through yeah, that makes a better sense in my head yeah, no, man, that was.

That was really good. That was really good because, it's true, it's the kind of thing I wish I heard when I was 18, you know, and now I'm 29 and, like now, I realize the value of having experiences and broadening my horizons, you know yeah, I think the problem with being young is you don't have, arguably, the disposal income that you might have as you do get older.

So some of the yeah, you know it shouldn't stop you trying or looking. You know, like, let's say, you can do some of these events for charity. You know, find your way. Yeah, don't don't close yourself into a box. Yeah, both physically and mentally yeah. I like that.

That's going to be the title of the episode. I think Nice, Very good, Johnny get back in your box. Yeah, or it's posh, or it's posh what it used to say to me when we're at sea get down your roll.

Stow your dits rat, so as I remember your.

Yeah, and then it chased me around the engine room where I saw his 40-spanner.

Still not as big as his hands. Yeah, exactly.

Oh, fantastic, I could talk all day. However, we're coming up on the end, but my final question to you, stu, before we close out, is a question I ask every guest, and I'd be very interested to hear what your answer is to this. What is a question you've never been asked? Not to hell.

I have heard your guests kind of talk about this one and I did muse on it and thinking, oh, what would I think? And sadly I'm not very clever.

So I'll disagree, but anyway.

I've never been asked. You know, even though in preparation I had a few things running through my head, they've completely gone.

Welcome to podcasting. Yeah, that is the being of every podcaster. It's like even there's two or three things you said during our conversation and I've gone. I'm going to ask them about that and I've completely forgotten.

You mostly had the unconditional positive regards, I must say.

It can be funny or serious.

Yeah, yeah, oh funny, I'm probably got, probably easier, but I kind of think of anything witty now which is unusual, but I can't come up with something stupid. I might have to get back to you on that. One, mate, I have to write in.

Right, you know what. That's the purpose of show notes. So I'm an inexperienced.

I'm afraid, my friend.

No, no worries at all. I just want to say thank you so much, hugh, for coming on. I've been looking forward to this conversation since I started the podcast a year and a half ago and we got back in touch about.

I would say a year ago, when we were.

Unfortunately we couldn't meet up in person, but no, we seem to be passing ships. I mean, yeah, we do, I know, but I'm hoping that the next time I'm in England and somewhat near your neck of the woods we can go out for that much overdue pine. And the first runs on me.

Oh, mate, that was wonderful. Yeah, too bad. Thanks very much for inviting me, mate. I appreciate it. I hope you've got what you wanted. I'm a real advocate for your podcast. I think it's amazing. Thank you so much I appreciate that. I tell as many people as I can and I think they'll get something from it. Maybe not this one, yeah.

I think we're on to a real winner with this one. I mean, I'm just glad I got to have a conversation with a friend, a long overdue conversation.

Absolutely mate, Absolutely Far too long.

Once again, stu, thank you so much for coming on and I'll hopefully have you back on sometime soon. Yeah, take it easy, brother. There you go, folks. That concludes today's episode. I hope you got a lot of value out of the content provided. If you did, then please do consider subscribing to the Curious Ulsterman podcast on your preferred streaming service and leaving us a five-star rating and review. That really helps the podcast grow. Thank you very much. If you would like to follow the Curious Ulsterman on the various social media channels to view upcoming content, the Curious Ulsterman is on Facebook, Instagram, twitter, tiktok, youtube and Twitch, all at the Curious Ulsterman. If you know someone who would benefit from this content, then please do share it with your friends and family on the various social media channels. You can also check out our website at wwwcuriousulstermancom, where you can view our full catalogue of episodes across all the seasons. If you would like to get in touch with the Curious Ulsterman, then please do get in contact on the various social media channels mentioned, or there is a voice note option on our website. As always, folks, I'm open to suggestions to make this podcast a better experience for you, the listener. If you tuned in today for the first time. Thank you very much and I hope you got value from the content I provide If you're one of our seasoned listeners. Thank you so much for the continuous support. I am eternally grateful. I hope you'll join us for next week's episode, folks, but until next time I wish you all the best. Bye for now.

Thanks for watching.